30 more things I believe
Part 2 of 2 (for now)
Well, it turns out the internet still loves a mf list. Discussing Part 1 with some friends in Greece, I mentioned that maybe the first 30 were too obvious, because I didn’t get much pushback / disagreement on my beliefs. They said “no, there were some really f**king stupid ones on there,” so I guess job well done?
I realized after posting that I did not include the inspiration for this format, so let me get right and do that before continuing any further:
30 more things I (do and don’t) believe about life, friendship, reading, writing, technology, and happiness…
I believe I can reframe anything to make it more beautiful. Returning a package? That’s going on a walk. Related: I believe we need to bring back “beauty” as a driving motivation/principle.
I believe the world opened up for me when I started to turn my “internet friends” into real friends. Some of my best friends are people I first knew online.
I believe being happy is simple, but not easy. I always feel good when I eat fresh food, swim in salt water, get sun, and spend time with people I care about. And yet I don’t do that regularly, because it’s not that easy to make that my life.
I believe focus is a muscle that strengthens and atrophies. If “abs are made in the kitchen,” focus is made by purpose/passion.
I do not believe in using my phone in front of people at the function. Brenner calls this “breaking the surface tension.” If I want/need to look at your device, I try to go outside or wait until I need the restroom. Related: I do not believe that non-parents care nearly as much about a disruptive baby as the parents themselves do (accepting this could curb the iPad baby epidemic).
I believe ingredients from the farmer’s market taste better. You are not a bad cook, you are just not using good ingredients and not salting your shxt enough. Don’t be scared of butter either! Related: “organic” is bullshit.
I believe most people we spend time with should be “low maintenance, high intimacy.” Jackson told me (and, separately, Naval) about this 2x2 he learned via Tim Ferris: high/low maintenance on one axis, high/low intimacy on the other. Spend a lot of time with low maintenance, high intimacy people. Spend no time with low intimacy, high maintenance.
I believe publishing my thinking is the best way to discover my true opinion. Even if it’s just in a group text. Writing about anything usually shows me that I didn't know it quite as well as I thought. Related: read Ava on this and everything else.
I believe I should quit more books. The goal is to lay it down the second I know it’s not hitting for me. There are too many great books to spend time slogging through anything less than that. Related: Brian Koppelman’s recommendation for City of Thieves reignited my love for reading and led me to Beneath a Scarlet Sky, my favorite book of the last decade.
I believe that listening to an audiobook while reading along is a superpower. It feels like a pedal assist bicycle, a similarly great technological advancement.
I believe podcasts are closer to music or reality TV than they are to reading. Retention is not the goal, but if something resonates and I retain it, that’s great. Related: Brent believes (and I agree) that we should be mindful of using podcasts to fill every dead space.
I believe cable news is poisoning the minds of people over 60 and sports betting is poisoning men over 30. I am far more concerned about sports betting than I am Instagram or TikTok.
I believe that “optimism is a moral duty”. More specifically, I have been trying to take this POV about technology.
I believe that doing nothing is doing something. This is a proactive (not retroactive) approach. That is, decide to do nothing before doing nothing. Rather than justifying having done nothing as doing something.
I believe most advice is useless, if not harmful. I find it more helpful for people to tell me their experience and use it to create my own advice. Related: I believe multiple opinions have diminishing returns.
I believe complacency is a slow death. Fight inertia. Do not mistake familiarity with comfort.
I believe it’s worth putting considerable effort and money into my home. A dining table for dinner parties, lamps to fill the space in a “soup of light,” speakers to play my favorite albums loud enough for my neighbors to hear, and linens that feel good to tuck into.
I believe the best investment decision I ever made was to ”DCA” into the S&P 500. Turns out, I cannot beat the market, nor can I properly time the market. I set and forget a weekly auto-buy with ~80% of my investable capital. The other 20% is for playing around and taking risks
I believe the Pareto Principle (80/20 rule) explains most dynamics. 80% of my gains come from 20% of my investments, 80% of my happiness comes from 20% of the people I spend time with. I am not sure if the goal is to “fix” the 80% that’s only giving 20% or accept that this is how it goes.
I believe that not working out should feel worse than working out feels good. When working out is a regular part of my routine, stasis is “feeling good” and breaking from that feels bad vs. stasis being bad and needing to workout to feel good.
I believe the “tyranny of numbers” has atrophied people’s abilities to listen to their body. Numbers can be helpful, but often cause me to lose the plot. I’ve found that I feel better when I let my body tell me what I really want, instead of the non-actionable anxiety associated with metrics.
I believe “winding down” is the key to a good night's sleep. I like to light candles and put my phone away an hour before I’m ready for bed.
I do not believe in letting the phone into the bedroom. Keep that space device-free.
I believe it only takes 1 month to take control of your email inbox. Unsubscribe daily for 31 days to be in the clear. From there, graduate to filtering out the un-unsubscribable “transactional emails” like terms of service updates.
I believe walking helps bring things up. When I go on a walk without my phone, my whole to-do list surfaces, feelings arise, and ideas come to light. I’m still not sure if the goal is to write them down or just let them be.
I do not believe things are ever as good or as bad as they seem. Beware of the power expectations have to shift your reality. Related: I believe that whether you think it’s good or it’s bad, you’re right.
I do not believe in free will. Discussions of free will are more interesting than they are helpful. Vey fun to debate late into the night, but be careful not to let it get in the way of your (perceived?) agency.
I believe that religion and spirituality have gotten a bad rap. They are not your youth pastor or the white guy with dreads. To me, spirituality means believing there is more to reality than the physical world.
I believe mushrooms changed (me for the better). It is hard to put into words how, but I believe they made me more empathetic. They definitely dissolved my animosity towards snakes (still not a huge fan).
I believe many of life’s biggest questions are answered in the Grant (Men of the Harvard) study. The longest ever study on human happiness can teach us a lot. There is a book covering the results.
ICYMI: this was Pt. 1 of this series
Beetlejuice Beetlejuice
When my wife suggested we see the Beetlejuice sequel this weekend, I admittedly wasn’t all that psyched. That was a mistake. Tim Burton has still got it. Michael Keaton has definitely still got it. And Willem Defoe has one of those small parts that leave you wanting more. See it in the theater if you can. —Justin
The Rooftop At Pier 17
Over the past month, I’ve been to two shows at Pier 17 in South Street Seaport. Both were Grateful Dead cover bands (Dark Star Orchestra and Joe Russo’s Almost Dead in case anyone’s interested). But the co-headliner is definitely the setting. The outdoor venue is perched on a rooftop with the Brooklyn Bridge serving as the backdrop to the stage. The venue is “right-sized”—not too big, not too small—and, for the moment, it also offers a unique perspective on the 9/11 Tribute In Light. If there’s an act you even remotely like playing at Pier 17 in the near future, definitely check it out. —Justin
Recent mixes I’ve enjoyed
These three kind of run the gambit. Almost three hours of the Dead (no, it’s not one song) to a rare mix from house legends (via world-class tastemaker Brian) and an R&B set at The Lot Radio (shoutout the homie Ethan!) —Andrew