There Are No Rules
Guidelines and best practices be damned
Justin and I try to post a new essay weekly, each writing on alternating weeks. This is the 40th edition in 54 weeks. We’ve been relatively consistent, all things considered, but have struggled to consistently post on a specific day of the week. Not that it really matters, but it is something we’ve tried to do. For a few weeks in a row, we were on a steady Friday cadence, followed by a few Tuesdays until a surprise Monday post from Justin last week.
The idea that “there are no rules” can mean many things, which I suppose is quite meta. Life is so structured in our early lives that it can be jarring to enter the real world and realize no one is making decisions for you anymore, telling you where you have to be and when. Becoming an adult is just realizing that everybody is winging it. A few people told me they liked my mention of growing up being partly characterized by realizing our parents have faults. They were winging it too. It took many personal stalemates before realizing decisions were not going to be made for me anymore. No more attendance policies or pre-requisites, just a handful of how-to-adult best practices.
Last year, I was listening to Quentin Tarantino on The Moment with Brian Koppelman and Brian tells Quentin about how Pulp Fiction changed the way he viewed making movies. Specifically, he was referring to the scene when Uma Thurman’s character Mia draws a square with her hands, and instead of saying “square,” the outline of a square (rectangle, really) appears on the screen. There is some history of the use of the square in that way, but Brian did not know that when he first saw the movie. To him, it was new and completely blew his mind. And him expressing that blew my mind.
He realized, and I realized, you can redefine convention if you want. If you dare. This has been a framework I’ve tried adopting in the months since. There are no rules. There are recommendations and prevailing wisdom, neither of which should be scoffed at or ignored. But there are no rules. And when you stop mistaking the former for the latter, the world opens up.
In Search of Virgil Abloh
When someone dies, there is a wave of obituaries and remembrances that flow in the days immediately afterward. But oftentimes, often owing to the peculiarities of print deadlines, there is a piece that comes out weeks or months after that initial rush that does the best job of capturing that person. I found this GQ story by Antwaun Sargent about Virgil Abloh to be just that. With times comes greater understanding—hence the phrase “history will be the judge”—and Sargent’s insider access as someone who was helping curate Abloh’s show at the Brooklyn Museum gives the story even greater context.
—Justin
Mark Boutilier on TikTok
I am not a big TikTok guy, but I came across Mark because he was a recent guest on Throwing Fits (the only podcast that matters, according to Jonah Hill). And to promote the appearance, TF put together this compilation for their Instagram, and I was hooked. What I like about folks like Mark and Nolitadirtbag is that they are clearly fans of the men’s fashion-downtown scene zeitgeist but can also recognize and point out the absurdity of it all. Something can be awesome and ridiculous at the same time, but too often we feel the need to either be all-in or all-out. In a similar vein, Christopher Buckley wrote an opinion piece in the Times about how the death of P.J. O’Rourke (both writers are worth your time) represents the passing of the last funny conservative. And it all got me wondering what the cost is—in politics, in fashion, in culture—for taking things too seriously.
—Justin
The Tea Spot Blood Orange Smoothie Tea
I am a slightly more frequent than average tea drinker – I know the types and have minor preferences, but that’s really it. This month I am living in Colorado, so I ordered tea from The Tea Spot. I knew I wanted green tea for some hot, late-morning caffeine, and hibiscus, which I brew cold and leave in the fridge for a tart treat when I’m ready for a change of pace from water. But I also wanted something herbal for after dinner. I sorted by best-sellers and as it turns out, the judges at the 2018 Globaltea Championship have great taste, because the Blood Orange Smoothie Tea has also earned the gold medal in our household.
—Andrew